


Fall to Live Again

by TVBS



Series: Flesh and Bones [6]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, M/M, incubus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-21
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-02 15:26:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5253377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TVBS/pseuds/TVBS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s been a while since Michael revealed his nature at the office. He still hasn’t left his apartment.</p><p>Even though everyone’s been by to see him.</p><p>And he’s trying to shift back to normal.</p><p>And he misses everyone.</p><p>And things aren’t going to be bad at the office again... right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A new entry! And new love to everyone that has kept with me so far- did you know it's been one year since I started this series? Happy One Year!

It could be a worse day. Somehow. Michael looked in his fridge, letting out a frustrated breath. How could he let himself get low on lunch meat of all things? He carefully wrapped a hand on the handle for the freeze and tugged, growling a little when he didn't see any frozen meals or pizzas waiting for him. Slowly, he let both doors close before going to the pantry. A scraping noise filled the air as he grabbed the doorknob, and he winced, readjusting his grip. Fucking claws. But he opened the door and looked in, scowling when not even chips resided in there. Of all fucking things to be out of. Just… fuck, his pantry looked barren. Everything did. He was damn near out of everything.

He'd have to leave the apartment soon if he wanted to restock. Ryan only brought so much when he came by, and Michael easily outpaced him. It did help a little bit that dinner was always provided by people trying to get him to leave the fucking apartment. But… Michael flexed his hands, feeling the unnatural way them moved. No, he looked like a fucking monster. Like some kind of demonic cat. He wasn't sure what kind of shapeshifter that was, if he actually was a shapeshifter. All he knew was he was stuck in this form despite all his attempts to turn back.

And boy had he tried. Every day, concentrating on the idea of making his hands go back to normal. Sometimes he felt like it would work, that they were starting to shift back to their human spots, and then nope. Back to this grotesque mockery of a hand. He had considered using Amazon Prime Now, but that had instantly been discarded when he realized that he would have to open the door for the delivery person. Nope. Not going to scare them with the glowing eyes and fangs. Though, it was Austin so he might have gotten stoners that would think he had on some good makeup. But no, he didn't want to push it. He had considered calling his parents to see if they knew anything about their family line and the nonhuman portion of it and which side it was and if either could help him turn back, and then he remembered how badly he slurred his words around his fangs when yelling at Gavin and everyone to get out of his apartment. Nope.

He had no idea how to turn back to normal. Fuck. Michael kicked the pantry door, then took a deep breath, trying to calm down. No, that was what put him in this situation in the first place. It was not fucking conducive to actually turning back to human form. He needed to be calm. Coolheaded.

Michael looked down at his hands, seeing the way the claws jutted out from the tips of his fingers. They looked like they should be retractable, but everything he had done said they weren't. And now all around the apartment, he had claw marks from where he had tried to hold things. He had managed to learn how to use his phone without clawing it to shit, so he had some form of entertainment, but he still couldn't use a computer without clawing the keyboard or play a game. And the worst part about gaming was he almost could, but the thumb claws would clack and get caught together on the controller if he even tried.

He just wanted to turn back to normal already. Just stop being a fucking… _monster._ None of the other nonhumans were monsters like this. Gavin was just a normal vampire with apparently a neat shapeshifting trick. Michael was damn sure that was magic because it looked nothing like Ray's shapeshifting. And hell, Ray himself was a normal werewolf, and looked human then looked like a wolf. Nothing inbetween like this. And Ryan was just a regular, run of the mill incubus.

Of course, none of them were partially human like he was. That might be why Michael's own shapeshifting was fucked up.

What if it was permanently fucked up? What if being angry and having his nonhuman nature finally completely be revealed by his rage fucked up him being able to turn back to normal? What would he do then?

Shit, that was an actual possibility. Michael sighed, glaring at his hands. He supposed he'd eventually go back into work and see what Burnie would be able to do for him, since Rooster Teeth had so many open nonhuman employees. The problem was actually getting there… The hands he could hide and fangs he could say were costume related, but the eyes. God. His eyes literally _glowed._ They looked hellish. And he didn't know if sunglasses would hide it.

Suddenly, he laughed, a thought grabbing him. "And I didn't even need the T-Virus to get these eyes," he giggled, the thought that he would be doing a half-assed cosplay of Wesker funnier than it should be. Every time the laughter started to subside, the idea of him in Gavin's aviators made him start cackling again until tears ran from his eyes.

He slowly stopped laughing after a while, carefully wiping his eyes and going out to the living room. It was getting late. Dinner would be coming soon. He should probably be ready when it came.

* * *

A knock at the door startled him. It was way too early for it to be his dinner today. Way too early. Michael put his phone down and made his way over to the door carefully, trying not to let anyone know he was there, and listened. Who was knocking on his door?

Nothing, then the sound of something being set down beside his door and someone leaving. Huh. A delivery. Michael waited a bit longer before unlocking his door and grabbing the small package, locking his door right afterwards. Something from Amazon… huh. He didn't order anything, but it was definitely shipped to him. Carefully, he sat on the floor next to the door and used his claws to open the package, snorting when he saw what was inside.

A pair of sunglasses and nail clippers for a pet. Well then. Michael checked the invoice, noting it had come from Ryan. Well, the fucking incubus was trying. Doing what he could to try to make thing better after what his part in the whole 'Michael outing himself as not human' fiasco was.

But clipping his claws would make things a lot easier. Now… to use them. Carefully, he put his pinky claw in the loop and squeezed, yelping at the feeling of his claw being clipped off. It didn't feel good at all. And now it looked ragged. Fuck. And he had nine more of those to go. Michael inhaled deeply as he moved down to the next claw, and clipped, whimpering a little. It almost hurt to do that.

Eight more.

Seven.

Six

God, his eyes were starting to tear up. Michael blinked the moisture away as he clipped his thumb and looked down at the results. Well, not that great, but they were down to a manageable level. He moved the clippers to his other hand and took a deep breath as he started to clip the claws on the other hand.

Four.

Three.

Two- fuck!

Michael hissed as he clipped one claw too close, looking down and realizing there was actual blood dotting out. Fuck. Just like fucking cat claws. Cutting the fuckers too close to the quick.

But he still had two more to go. Michael grit his teeth and clipped the last two, then stumbled to his feet for the kitchen. He grabbed a handful of paper towels and pressed them to his bleeding claw, breathing heavily. Now his claws were down to a level he could do things. Like maybe get on the computer. Or play a game.

He just needed now to learn how to turn his hands back to normal.

* * *

The smell of food pulled Michael out of his gaming zone. It smelled so good, and he knew exactly who it was today. Only one person would bring burgers smelling like that.

"Hey, Michael." Gavin's voice filtered through the door. "Geoff and I are here today. Geoff made hamburgers tonight."

Yeah, he could smell them. Michael's mouth watered as he came close to the door, hand trying to rest as flat as it could against the doorframe.

"You having a good day in there?" Geoff asked him. "Still alive and all that?"

"Yeah." Geoff and Gavin… he didn't want to open the door for them, but he wanted to talk to them again. Geoff was so much like a father to him, and Gavin…

He could hear one of them shifting his weight. "Mind if we come in?" Geoff finally asked. "We brought Coke too."

Fuck no. "Just leave it at the door."

"Michael," Gavin started before Michael cut him off.

"Gavin, no. I'm not letting you in. Just leave everything you brought at the door."

"You can't hide in there forever," Geoff told him.

Michael sighed, resting his head against the door. "Yeah, but I can until I can figure out what the hell I'm doing."

"If you want help, we can help you." Gavin sounded almost next to the door. "I know what it's like to have been human, then not. I can help you with that transition. Ray can help you with learning to manage your forms. Just, please, let us in."

"Gavin, look, I can't right now." Michael found himself caressing the doorknob, wanting to open it and let them in. But he knew how demonic he looked. "Leave what you have. We'll worry about anything else later."

"But-"

"Come on, Gav." There was the sound of something being set down, then Geoff's weary voice as he said, "We're not getting anywhere today with him."

There was a beat, then something heavier being set down - a twelve pack? "We'll be back," Gavin promised. "Michael, my boi… I still love you."

"I love you too," Michael whispered, knowing Gavin would be able to hear him as they left. Once he was sure they were gone, he opened the door and grabbed the food and the actual twenty-four pack of Coke. Mm, twenty-four cans of soda. Locking the door, Michael sighed, looking over at the sunglasses that Ryan had shipped to him.

If he couldn't turn back, he had all the tools to make it to Rooster Teeth and only thought of as weird by his neighbors. The problem with that was he would know he wasn't back to human shape. He would know that he hadn't succeeded in being normal again. And that was unacceptable. He had to be normal again. He had to succeed in being his usual self and go back to human.

Michael stared at the clipped claws, trying to make them go back to a normal human shape. Trying to be normal again.


	2. Chapter 2

So he didn't have a pair of gloves that would fit his hands. Michael stared at the gloves he did have, growling. His hands were so twisted now that he couldn't slide them into the fingers at all. Goddamn it. He threw the gloves against the wall, going to his couch and picking up the controller. He needed to play some games to calm down. Though, considering how games sometimes went, that might serve to piss him off more.

But it couldn't be nearly as bad. Just… fuck. He was so close to being able to leave the apartment. The sunglasses were dark enough that he could actually hide his eyes. Of course, if it was dark out he couldn't see, but he didn't need them if he was driving. Just to get down to his car. But if he couldn't hide his hands, he couldn't leave quite yet. He would need to hide his very inhuman hands from his very human neighbors. Though, it was interesting how he just instinctively knew that his neighbors were human. It was like how he knew that the werewolf was someone he knew. It really made him wonder… was he really a shapeshifter? Ray couldn't say who was human and who wasn't just by looking at them. But then, what was he?

That kind of shit was still bothering him, even now. Michael snarled to himself as he shot an enemy. He needed to figure this shit out, and soon. It was fucking annoying.

A quick look at the clock made him pause the game. It was close to dinner time. Someone was going to come by in the next few minutes with food. Probably Ray and Tina. They hadn't been by in a while. It had actually been Geoff, Gavin, and sometimes Griffon for a while there. And God, it had been so hard not to open the door every time he heard Gavin's voice. He just wanted to see him again. Something inside him wanted to grab him, wanted him so badly. But he couldn't, not until he got this under control. He didn't want Gavin to look at him with that fear in his eyes again.

Michael stretched as he stood, yawning. Tina usually made some pretty good food. He kind of looked forward to this.

A knock came at his door, right on cue. He made his way over, listening for who it was. Quiet, huh. Even Ray and Tina would be talking a little bit. Michael sighed as he realized who it would be. "Hey, Ryan."

"How have you been?"

Michael's hand came up to rest against the door before he realized it was lifting up. "Okay. Thanks for the nail clippers and sunglasses."

He could hear the smile in Ryan's voice as he spoke. "I figured you would want those. Your claws looked pretty long there. Did they work okay?"

"Yeah, they worked fine." Fuck, he wanted to open the door. Some part of him just… responded so well to Ryan. It reached for him, wanted him. But there was no way he was going to do that, even if he was human. "All nice and clipped."

"That's good." There was a rustling of a bag. "I brought you dinner. You need anything else? Soda, snacks?"

Michael shook his head even though he knew Ryan couldn't see it. "I'll be fine. Thanks."

"Good." The bag was set down next to the door, and Michael could hear Ryan hesitate. "Gavin won the Tower of Pimps today," he finally said. "Took Geoff by surprise. Took us all by surprise, really."

That made Michael laugh. "He was being his idiot self and then won somehow, didn't he."

"He's a lot more devious than I remember," Ryan mused. "That, or we underestimate him more than we should." He went quiet for a moment, then cleared his throat. "I brought Whattaburger," he told him. "The fries might be cold by now, though. Sorry."

"Burger's a burger," Michael told him, his stomach growling.

"Yeah." There was a sound, then, "I'll see you later."

It was nice sometimes when Ryan came by. He didn't always try to coax him out. Michael waited until he was sure Ryan was gone, then opened the door to grab the bag. As Ryan had said, it was definitely Whattaburger, and the fries were definitely cold by now. The burger was fine, though, and he took a big bite as he looked at his locked front door. It sounded like things were going like they usually did at work. He'd be lying if he said he didn't miss it. Just… everyone. How they all interacted and just… yeah. Michael looked down at one hand as he ate, flexing it. How did he fucking do this? The bones moved under his skin in a way that they shouldn't, and he could suddenly feel every movement. He remembered how it felt before-

There was a cracking noise as his fingers popped, bones starting to move back to their rightful positions before snapping back to the twisted mess. Michael stared down at his hand, a mouthful of burger sitting half chewed as his heart pounded. He had almost done it. Something had happened. He flexed his hand again, trying to remember what had happened. He had really felt every bone under his skin, but what had he done to do that? How had he become so hyper-aware of it?

Michael continued to flex his hand as the burger grew cold in his hand, forgotten as he failed to replicate what he had done.

* * *

Fuck. There was a step he was missing. He had started to get down how to feel his bones, but actually getting them to go back to normal was not coming. He was missing something and he didn't know what. Michael stared at his hand in frustration, flexing it again as it popped. Always so close, and yet not close enough. Never close enough.

Okay. One last time. Feel how the skin stretches over the bone. Feel how the bones move. And… they popped, shifted- and went back to their non-human position. Goddamn it.

A knock at the door made him jump. Fuck, he had lost track of time. And now dinner was here. Michael stood up and went to the door, smiling as he heard Tina say something to Ray. "Hey guys."

"Michael, hey." Tina still sounded upbeat, even after all this time. "How're you doing?"

"Okay." His hand reached out without thinking, and he hesitated. Should he really stop himself? He was so close to figuring it out, and here was Ray. Here was a werewolf, and if he was some kind of shapeshifter, or he had more than one form, Ray would be able to help him go back to his human form.

"Dude, you missed a great day," Ray said as he mused this over. "We almost tricked Ryan to get on AHWU. And Lindsay did her playthrough of this horror game-"

"Ray." Michael's voice shut him up. "Listen… can you send Tina away?"

There was a shuffling noise, the two of them turning to look at each other probably, then Tina spoke up, puzzled. "Is something wrong?"

"I just have an idea, and I don't want you to see me." Michael rested his head against the door, closing his eyes. "I don't look like Ray, Tina. I don't know what he told you, but I really don't look human. So I really don't want to scare you off."

"Dude, it's going to take more than that to scare me," she laughed. "And Ray told me what you look like. It's okay."

Michael hesitated. This could go really bad. Really, really bad. But… yeah. Slowly, he opened the door. As he expected, Tina took a step back, looking alarmed with the bag of dinner in her hands while Ray swallowed at the sight of him. "Get in here," he told them, moving so they could enter.

For a moment, neither of them moved. Then Tina grabbed Ray's hand, the movement spurring the both of them into stepping forward into his apartment. "Cool eyes," she told him as Michael closed the door behind them, trying to keep her tone light.

He smiled weakly at that. "Yeah. So…" Michael held up one hand, making Tina wince as she saw the inhuman twisted mess, putting the bag down on the table. "I think I can come back to work as long as I can make this go back to normal. And I'm close to doing so, but I'm missing something. I figure, since you're a werewolf and you shift between human and wolf…"

"I can help you figure out how to shift back to a more human form," Ray finished. "Yeah, of course. I've been waiting for you to say that. You might also want to take care of the fangs and eyes too. But if you take care of the hands, those should go with it."

Michael touched his mouth, having forgotten about his fangs. They had gotten in the way so little after the initial shift that they had just fallen by the wayside. But yes, having them go back to human shape would be nice too. He nodded, looking determined. "So, how do you do it? How do you look human?"

Ray frowned. "It's not that I look human. I am human. And a wolf. Here." He reached out for Michael's hand, holding it up and lightly running his fingers over the twisted mess of fingers. "That's something I do. I feel all this-" He tapped Michael's palm. "And I remember how it felt to be the other form. And I just… make the distinction between it. Like I tell myself that my body is human right now, and I remember what it's like to feel like a wolf. So I make sure to feel like I'm a wolf, and not a human, and boom, I'm a wolf."

Michael blinked. "So, do you feel like all parts of you and then…"

"Say to myself 'That's not a wolf' and tell myself what a wolf feels like. And then I'm a wolf."

Was that was he had been missing. Michael stared at his hand, trying to ignore the warmth of Ray holding it, and made himself aware of how it felt. Told himself it was… whatever it was. Not human. And what was it like to be human again? How did that feel? Fuck, he had taken it for granted so much…

He could see Tina jump as his hands popped, bones starting to shift slightly. But they didn't go back to being human. "Damn it!"

"Huh. That's… pretty damn good." Michael looked up at him, scowling as Ray nodded. "Your fangs got smaller as you did that. I think we're on to something."

His fangs. Michael licked his teeth, thinking about that. Maybe that was something. He looked over at Tina, then blinked at the look on her face. It was… something. He couldn't tell what it was, but it was like she was thinking about something and she wasn't sure what she thought of it. Michael looked over at Ray, down at their hands, then back at Tina.

She shook herself, and smiled at him. "I'll go heat up your dinner while you work on that."


	3. Chapter 3

"Holy shit fuck," Michael gasped. "That fucking hurt."

Ray winced as Michael's bones went back to their resting position. "Yeah, I can see that," he told him. "You got pretty close. Try again, I think you'll get it this time."

"Like I was going to stop now," Michael muttered. Every day, he got a little closer. And every day, it felt a little different. Hurt a little bit more, like his body was rejecting the shift back to human. But… he could do this. He ran his thumb over his fingers, smirking as he felt the rough ridge where his claws used to be. Managed that so far, at least. If he could shift his claws away, he could definitely shift his hands and teeth back to human. Michael closed his eyes again, easily falling into the sensation of feeling how everything moved under his skin. How his bones twisted around in a way that wasn't human. How his teeth rested against his lips. Then, he tried to remember how it felt to be human. Fangs reduced to human shape. Hands smoothed into human limbs. Cracks filled the air as pain wracked through Michael, bones rearranging themselves under his skin.

And then they stopped, shifting back to before. Michael grunted, opening his eyes. "Damn it."

Ray was nodding, though. "Say something with an "s" in it."

"What's up, dick… whoa." Michael grinned as he realized the lisp never came as he spoke. He touched his mouth, smiling wider as his finger encountered human teeth. "Fucking awesome."

"I'd say with a good pair of sunglasses, you're just about ready to come back to work."

Michael shook his head. "Not yet. I saw how people reacted when they saw the not-human me. And I know how I look. I think I'm going to make sure I look human before I come back to work, thank you very much."

Ray stared at him for a moment. "Yeah, dude… that may not be possible. I don't know what you are, but you're not any kind of shapeshifter I know of. It doesn't usually hurt to shift. And you have a lot of human in you. Like, a lot of human. Now that you've shifted, I don't know what kind of control you'll have to shift completely between your forms. You might not have any control now over certain parts of you."

Not have any control. Michael looked down at his hands in alarm. He had managed to take care of the claws and fangs, but he still looked so very inhuman. And if he couldn't shift back? "What the hell?"

"I don't know." Ray shrugged. "Hell, from what I can see, something's trying to _keep_ you in this form. Shapeshifting doesn't do that. Even when I'm shifting uncontrollably, I'm not stuck in a form. I don't know what could be doing that."

"Other than something fucked up," Michael muttered. "Great. So the fact I'm mostly human is coming back to bite me in the ass."

"Maybe." Ray reached out, stroking a hand through Michael's curls. "But hey. You got the claws and fangs gone."

Michael found himself leaning into the touch, eyes slipping closed. It felt so good… so soothing… "Mm."

"We all miss you," Ray told him softly, shifting his weight as Michael started leaning into him, his arms coming up to hold him. "Vav's not the same without you. And we all miss recording with you."

"I miss it too," Michael admitted softly. "I miss you guys. But I can't scare everyone again like I did before."

Ray's fingers threaded through his curls, gentle and soothing. "We're tougher than you think," he finally said.

Michael pulled back slowly, resting his forehead on Ray's. He did miss everyone. And… in many ways, it was that he didn't want to scare them, but… "I'm fucking ashamed of myself." He closed his eyes as Ray's hand cupped the back of his head. "I lost control like that, and I can't get it back."

"You'll get it back." Ray's hand tightened slightly, as if trying to convince him through touch. "We can do this."

Michael smiled, reaching up to touch Ray's hand. Yeah. They could. He opened his mouth just as a knock came at the door. Tina, it must be, he realized as he pulled back. It must be time for her to pick Ray up. He looked over at him, frowning as he saw him look away, wiping his mouth. "You okay, dude?"

"Yeah, fine." Ray smiled at him as he went to the door. "We'll work on the rest of it tomorrow. Hey, Tina," he said as he opened the door, revealing his girlfriend.

"Hey." She looked past him, waving at Michael. "Hey Michael. How's everything?" Michael smiled at her, which made her lips curve in response. "Nice! That makes claws and teeth, right?"

"Yep." Ray looked back over at Michael. "See you tomorrow."

Michael waved at them. "See you. Bye, Tina."

Tina waved back at him as they left. Once they did, Michael locked the door behind them, feeling a little victorious as he didn't hear the scrape of claws against wood, and looked at his hand.

He just needed to shift back to human. Just a little shift. That's all. Just feel everything in his bones, feel how they weren't human… just desire to be human more than ever, to have them look like Ray's hands again, to curve like human-!

A hideous crack snapped through the air as Michael screamed, curling around his hands. Fuck, it almost felt like his hands were _broken._ He breathed heavily for a moment, eyes clenched tightly. That hurt. That hurt a lot.

What just happened?

Michael uncurled slightly, pulling one hand out. It still looked twisted, but… no. Two fingers weren't.

Two fingers were back to normal.

* * *

Ray shoved the washcloth in Michael's mouth, nodding. "Okay. Ready?"

Michael nodded. He had gotten another finger, but fuck it hurt. But he had it now. He had to focus on Ray's hands. On the curve and lines of them. The feel of them against his skin. The way his bones didn't match that, and how they would. A scream built behind the washcloth as bones cracked into place, but he held still as he kept his eyes on Ray's hands. As long as Ray didn't move again, he got this.

Ray's hands jumped slightly at the muffled scream, but he didn't move. He just stared at Michael, swallowing, waiting. A whine started to come from him, worried as more bones cracked into place. But he'd placate Ray later. Just a little more. He got two more fingers. Just-

A burst of pain ricocheted through his head, nearly causing him to black out. Michael swayed, then realized he was falling sideways onto the floor. Good thing they were sitting, he thought hazily. Would have sucked to fall from a standing position. He couldn't stop Ray from coming over to him, only could huddle into him slightly as he pulled him into his lap, clinging as the pain started to fade. "Fuck," he whispered, realizing the washcloth had fallen out of his mouth onto the floor. "Please tell me I at least look completely human now."

Ray picked up his hands, looking them over as Michael stifled a pained hiss, then at his eyes. "Well, you want the good news or the bad news first?"

"Just tell me, you asshole."

"Good news, your hands are completely human again. Bad news…" He tapped Michael's temple. "Your eyes are still yellow and glowing."

Well fuck. Michael closed his eyes. That was great. Everything but the eyes. Everything but the unnaturally glowing eyes.

Ray's hand stroked through his hair. "We can work on that later," he told him. "That… looks really good right now, though. A pair of sunglasses, and you'd look human."

"I'd look like an idiot," Michael muttered. "And it's not like I have superhuman eyesight where I can see even in the dark. I would have to take them off inside."

"It's up to you." Ray ran his thumb across Michael's eyebrow. "Though, I can tell you, I think you look pretty awesome with the glowing eyes."

Michael snorted, smiling a little as Ray continued to stroke his face. It felt good. "Can't exactly do live action shit with glowing eyes."

"We can figure that out later."

He could hear the 'we miss you.' Fuck. He missed them too. But… "Yeah. I guess."

* * *

Human hands. Human teeth. Sunglasses.

Fuck. Could he does this? Should he do this?

Michael shook his head. Fuck it. As long as he wore the sunglasses, no would would say shit.

As so, he settled the glasses on his nose and opened his front door, grabbing his keys as he went.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey Michael!" Barbara's voice reached him as he walked through the building, stopping him for a moment. Did he answer her, or…? "Nice sunglasses," she commented as she came up next to him. "Man, I haven't seen you in forever. Everything okay?"

"Yeah. Everything's fine." That's it. Make it sound like a normal day.

"Cool." She hesitated, and he wondered, could she still see his eyes? Could she still see the way they glowed past the sunglasses? Barbara hadn't seen his transformation firsthand, but there was no way she didn't hear about it after. "Burnie wants to see you when you got in," she finally said. "He should be in his office."

"Thanks, Barb." He gave her a small wave as he left.

No one wanted to look him in the eye, Michael noticed as he walked towards Burnie's office. They all glanced at him, but none of wanted to look at him. No one wanted to stare at the monster, he thought bitterly. Those who actually did look at him looked scared, as if they knew he was a fucking monster. Of course. And he didn't really have anything to refute that. He had thrown Gavin around. He had torn up Lindsay's arm. Fuck, he would call himself a monster. He certainly seemed like one.

Thankfully, Burnie actually was in his office. He looked up from his computer, and smiled at Michael. "Hey there! Didn't expect to see you in anytime soon."

Michael shrugged. "Decided it was time to come back."

"Good thing too, because I was about to tell one of the nonhumans to break in and drag you back to work." Burnie was _probably_ kidding. "So, you're some kind of shapeshifter and you shifted at work. People are understandably a little upset about this. How do you want to go on from here?"

"Well, I'm tired of hiding," Michael retorted. "I'd rather be back at work than at home. So they can fucking deal with it."

Burnie nodded. "Second, I notice you're still wearing sunglasses even though you're indoors. Light hurt them?"

"No." Michael took a deep breath, and slid the glasses down his nose. When Burnie tensed at the glowing eyes staring at him, Michael pushed them back up. "I can shift everything back but that."

"Huh." Burnie considered this, then nodded. "So, you'd going to be off live action shit until you get that under control. No podcasts, no shows, and anything live action Achievement Hunter wants to do, you can't be there. No AHWU or anything like that. That clear?"

Michael nodded. "Yeah. Crystal."

"Good." Burnie stood, coming over to him. Then, he pulled him quickly into a hug. "Fuck, I missed your stupid face," he muttered, letting go of him. "Don't ever do that shit again."

"I won't." Michael smiled, hooking his thumbs into his pockets. "So, everything cool?"

"Yeah. You go scream at video games. I got to get back to work." As Michael turned to leave, Burnie spoke up one more time. "Hey, Michael?"

"Yeah?"

"About time you didn't interrupt me while I ate."

* * *

Michael's legs dangled as Geoff picked him up in a big bear hug. "About time you came back," he told him as he put Michael down. "Shit hasn't been the same since you left. Jeremy and Lindsay are great, but they're not you." Geoff paused, then rubbed his mouth. "We told the fans you were sick," he said awkwardly. "And you couldn't come in or go online because you were fighting that off. Don't know how you want to build off of that."

That would explain some of the tweets he had seen. He hadn't responded to any of them - hell, he hadn't tweeted at all. "I'll figure something out," he muttered. "Burnie has me off live action until I have everything under control, so I guess we can say I'm not in any of that because I still look terrible and still recovering."

"You look pretty good to me," Geoff pointed out. "What's still wrong?" When Michel tilted his sunglasses down, Geoff inhaled sharply. "Oh. Fuck. Yeah, I see why. Okay, so you're off live action. We're going to record some GTA in a bit. Ready to do stupid shit in a video game?"

Michael laughed at that. Fuck, he had missed doing that. "Yeah. Just let me get my shit set up."

It felt so nice being back, he reflected as he went over to his computer. He really had missed all of this. As he turned it back on, he heard Ray's voice talking to someone as he came in. Michael turned just as Ray went quiet, realizing who else was in the room. "Hey."

"Michael!" There was suddenly a very enthusiastic werewolf coming for him, hugging him with glee. "About time you decided to make your way out of your hole! So, you manage the eyes yet?"

When Ray finally let him go, he shook his head. "Not yet. But hey." He held up a hand, wiggling the human fingers. "Good enough, right?"

"Michael." Gavin's voice stopped him, and he looked up at who Ray had been talking to. There, holding a Red Bull, was Gavin, looking at him with wonderment. "You're back. You're… you're finally back at work."

"Yeah." Ray wisely stepped out of the way, giving them space. "I… I missed you," Michael finally said quietly.

"I missed you too, my boi." Gavin smiled at him. "We had to skip you in VS. Lindsay ended up losing to Ryan."

Michael smiled back at him. "Sounds like you guys had a lot of fun."

"It wasn't with you."

Gavin's quiet voice made Michael look away. "I'm back now," he finally said.

"Yeah."

Geoff cleared his throat, making Michael and Gavin jump. He had forgotten about him and Ray. "If you two are done having your romantic moment, we need to get back to work," he told the two of them. "We're recording GTA."

Gavin nodded, looking back at Michael. "I need to talk to you," he told him softly. "After we record."

"After we record," Geoff told them. "Otherwise, get your asses in gear and let's get going."

* * *

The fact it was still fucking freezing didn't bode well. Something was still off and wrong about everything at Rooster Teeth, and no one seemed to want to figure out what it was. At least, Michael didn't see any of the new interns caring about it when he got up to go to the bathroom and saw one using the pantry without a second thought. But still. It was so goddamn cold.

Finally, recording for the day was over and Michael stretched. He had _missed_ this. It felt so good to be back with everyone, to record video games again. Hell, when things didn't go his way, it felt good to get pissed off and start yelling at people. Shit was fun again. And he had missed being able to do that. It made him forget about the whole not human thing and just be himself again.

Gavin stood up next to him, reaching out. "Hey, Michael," he started before he got up as well.

"Yeah, I remember. What'd you want to say?"

Gavin shook his head, motioning for Michael to follow him. Curious, he did so, following Gavin to an empty office. "So what's-"

Michael's words were cut off as Gavin grabbed his face, bringing him in to kiss him. Before Michael could even raise his hands to Gavin's hips, he had let go and stepped back. "I just wanted to do that one last time, is all."

"One last time?" Michael frowned, still trying to catch up with the events that had happened. "What do you mean?"

"Michael…" Gavin closed his eyes, the weight of centuries appearing on his face. "I'm not stupid."

"About what?" Michael asked, trying to follow what was going on.

Gavin made a frustrated noise. "There's something going on with you and Ray. He helped you shift back somehow, and you can… Michael, if you're a shapeshifter, I know. Shapeshifters can turn back to human with the help of a loved one."

Oh. Michael looked away. "It's more… Ray loves me," he told him quietly. "I keep him from shifting into a werewolf. He helped me learn how to shift back to human."

Silence fell between them, then Gavin sighed. "When were you going to tell me?"

"I don't love Ray," Michael snapped at him.

"Liar." Gavin sighed, closing his eyes. "That's a lie. But… I suppose it doesn't matter. You're back to human now because of Ray." Gavin opened his eyes, looking at Michael. "I don't know what to do about this," he admitted. "I know what happened between you and Ryan was because he was hurt. He told me after you-" Gavin shook his head. "But I've also seen how you react to Ryan. I don't know if it's addicting to shag an incubus, but… you want to sleep with him again."

"I won't."

"I know." Gavin just looked so old, so sad. "But I don't know what to do right now. I love you, boi. And I want to be with you. I just needed to talk to you about this, and kiss you one last time in case…"

Michael let him trail off. He knew what that meant. In case they actually broke up for good. "I want to be with you too," he told him finally.

"I know. And Ray and Ryan. Like I said, I'm not stupid." Gavin rubbed his forehead, sighing. "I just don't know if I can handle sharing you. Let me think about this, Michael. Let me think about if I can share you, or if it's better we break up so you can be with them."

The words kept Michael rooted there as Gavin left. His hands flexed, then he took a deep breath as he felt them not move quite human.


	5. Chapter 5

Half of Achievement Hunter wasn't in today. That was a thing, so soon after he came back to work, Michael thought wryly. But there was a convention, so Jack, Geoff, and Gavin went to represent their side of Rooster Teeth. Which left Ryan, Ray, and himself back at base, which was a lovely combination. Especially so soon after talking to Gavin about this very fucking thing. It wasn't like Gavin would be upset or jealous, Michael reasoned. He knew what was going on and how Michael felt about the whole thing. So hopefully he wouldn't come back and be all 'Grr my mate' or whatever vampire bullshit he could go on about.

Though, he had said something that made him a little wary. Was it addicting to sleep with an incubus? Could the reason why he reacted to Ryan was because he was fucking addicted to him? He wish he knew more about what was going on with the whole thing. Did that kind of thing happen at all? Or was there something else going on? Fuck, he wish he knew.

Michael got up, heading for the kitchen and shivering as he went. It was just so fucking cold now… He hated to have to come anywhere over here, but he needed to get something out of the refrigerator. The mini-fridge was empty somehow, and he needed some water.

"Hey, Michael," a woman greeted him, casually opening the pantry and rooting around in it. He tensed, waiting for something to happen before she closed it, holding a jar of peanut butter. "Um… I'm glad to see you back."

"Thanks," he muttered, wondering where he had seen her before. She looked really familiar. But as she made her sandwich and started to walk off, he just couldn't place her. Then, she turned, smiling at him.

"I'm glad you told me it wasn't haunted," she said, confusing him. "I fucking hate ghosts." The way she spoke said she had met a few ghosts before which… Michael tensed at that as she left, white blonde hair trailing after her. What kind of interns were they hiring? Obviously he had talked to her before, but when? His eyes widened as he realized when, and stared at the pantry door.

The last time they had talked, Gavin had come back through that door. And something told him that she was more than she let on. Maybe something akin to what Burnie had, though… Ray couldn't find other nonhumans. But he knew Gavin was a vampire (though that one was a duh because he wasn't exactly hiding it) and he already knew the werewolf was Ray just by looking at him. He could tell something was up with that woman too. Something just didn't fit right with her. The way she was casual around this kind of thing wasn't just the thing in the pantry messing with her mind; she seemed like she had dealt with this kind of thing before. What did it mean, that he could tell all this? Did it mean that Burnie had some of whatever he was in his family tree too, since this was kind of like what Burnie could do?

There was just too little he knew about this entire thing. Michael started back to the office, taking a sip of water as he went. If he knew more, that would be one thing, but…

Fuck.

Michael sat down in his chair, coming up with no answers as he thought. He wish he could. Just… nothing came to mind.

"You doing okay?" Ray asked him, leaning over. "You're smelling kind of weird."

Well, he wasn't going to tell him about Gavin. The whole thing about 'Ray loves you and you love Ray' was something he needed to figure out first. Because yeah, he did love Ray. He loved everyone at Rooster Teeth. But Gavin seemed to be seeing something else there and he needed to figure out what it was. "What kind of special werewolf powers do you have?" he asked instead, going with his other thoughts.

Ray frowned, thinking it over. "Sense of smell, obviously," he said. "I'm pretty fucking strong too. And of course I'm a human and a wolf. What's up?"

He had the strength… but he didn't have the sense of smell. Was it because he was mostly human, or was it because he wasn't the same kind of shapeshifter as Ray? "I just want to fucking figure out what I can do."

Ray's eyebrows climbed up as he leaned back. "Something happen?"

"No! Just…" Fuck, Ryan was taking his headphones off and looking at them. He didn't want this. Why did it just have to be them? "I'm tired of not knowing what I can do and feeling it out little by little. If I'm a shapeshifter like you are, I should be able to figure things out from you, right?"

"It might not work because you're not the same kind," Ryan told him kindly. "You look more like a cat, so you might have more abilities linked towards a cat."

"I don't fucking feel like a cat, though," Michael snapped at him.

"He does have a point, dude," Ray pointed out. "You knew who I was when I was wolfed out, and that's not any kind of ability I've heard of for a werewolf. Cats have this more thing about body language, so that might be how you did it."

"It still doesn't feel right," he retorted. "I can't see in the fucking dark. My eyes are just yellow and glowing. They don't slit like a cat's. I just don't fucking understand what the fuck-"

Ray slid his chair towards him, reaching out. "Whoa, man. Come here." He pulled Michael into a hug, moving so his nose was pressed into Ray's shoulder. "Here, smell me all up."

Michael laughed a little at that as Ray stroked his hair. "I'm smelling that weird?"

"Your hands were starting to shift," Ryan pointed out. "I don't know if you could feel it."

His hands. Michael flexed them, his heart in his throat as he felt them move in that inhuman way. It was too easy to shift. He needed to be more careful about that. "Ray," he mumbled, nosing his shoulder.

"Mm?"

"How easy is it for you to shift?"

Ray took a deep breath. "I've been doing this my whole life, so you have to remember that. But… sometimes way too easy. And when I'm stressed out, I end up shifting into a form more suited to fighting. It's always easy to shift back, though. It'll become easy for you too, with practice."

Easy to shift back. Something about that didn't sit right with him. It wasn't easy for him to shift back into his human form. He felt Ray's fingers card through his curls, and he relaxed, flexing his hands. They still didn't move quite right. "This is going to suck," he mumbled. "Sorry, Rye."

"For what?"

Michael didn't answer as he started focusing on his hands. They needed to go back to human. So… remember how it felt for them to be human. The hand in his hair helped remind him of what they were supposed to look like, and then- the crack filled the air, and Michael bit back a scream, trying to curl up around his hands while still up against Ray's shoulder.

"Holy shit!" He could hear Ryan coming over to him, and then his hands gently touched his back. "Michael, are you okay?"

"Ow," he said plainly. Then, he flexed his fingers, sighing when they moved normally. "Just shifting them back to normal."

"That is not a normal shapeshifter thing." Ryan sounded concerned as he rubbed circles on Michael's back.

"It's not," Ray confirmed. "But who knows what happens when you've got human blood in you."

"Yeah," Ryan admitted. "I admit, I worry for my kids too. But there's a community for incubi and succubi that are part human considering how often we have human lovers. I've never heard of that for anything else."

"That's mostly because I didn't think we could make a baby with a human." Michael lifted his head a little, staring at Ray. He smiled a little bit, nodding. "Yeah, I had that talk with Tina already. But I didn't think shapeshifters could have children with humans. I've never met any werewolves that were part human, and that's all I grew up around."

"Doesn't mean they don't exist," Ryan pointed out.

"Maybe. It's just really weird."

Michael let his head drop back onto Ray's shoulder, digesting those words. They were saying he was a shapeshifter by the fact he turned into something else. Something weird. But… then what could he be? Ray's fingers ran through his curls, making his eyes close. He wanted so badly to just enjoy this, but his head was so full of thoughts about what everything could mean. What was he? Was he really a shapeshifter?

And he still couldn't really forget the intern. Something about her was off. He couldn't tell what, but he knew it. She was too casual around him. Too casual about ghosts. Too casual in general about the whole thing.

Michael took a deep breath, wishing Gavin was there as Ray combed his fingers through his hair.


	6. Chapter 6

How cold it was had become too distracting now. Michael shuddered, rubbing his arms. This would be nice during summer, but right now, it was starting to be a little hellish. And Ray wasn't going to shift and come sit up against his legs like before because everyone was there, and Geoff had this thing about no naked Ray while he was around. So Michael just had to sit and suffer without a furry furnace by his feet.

Which sucked. Though, for the best. Gavin hadn't been particularly possessive when he came back from the convention, but he still didn't want to push it. Who knew how he'd react if Ray stripped, shifted, and laid on Michael's feet? He could react like he used to, or he could react really poorly to it. Fuck, he didn't know how that would go down and he didn't want that shitstorm to happen at work. Not another one. He was tired of that.

Michael blew into his hands, rubbing them together to try to warm them up. Fuck. He needed to get up and do something for a bit. Walk around. Get the blood flowing. He was at a point that all he needed to do was render anyway. Michael got up and started out of the office, shivering. It wasn't so bad before. What was it about today that made it so damned cold?

He stopped at the door, looking back at Gavin. He just… wanted to _grab_ Gavin. Shake him. Pin him. Didn't he know? That it didn't matter? That he was still _Michael's_ , no matter what else happened, no matter who else happened? It was a bad thought to have, one that made his jaw hurt as his teeth started to change and hands tried to shift too easily to another form. Michael pushed his sunglasses up further on his nose, taking a deep breath. Fucking hell.

Fuck everything. He didn't want Ray or Ryan. He wanted _Gavin._ What happened, how he reacted to the others… he'd figure that out later.

Two interns hurried past him, talking in low tones. One of them turned to glare at him from behind a curtain of red hair, making him frown before her friend grabbed her in a slim dark hand, whispering in an insistent tone. She relented, going with her towards the kitchen. Huh. Interesting. Michael walked away, feeling a little better the more he moved. Definitely warming up. Felt good. He would definitely be able to go back to work soon.

Back to work. Back to that awkward room with Gavin. Michael really wished he knew what instinct it was that made him want to grab and pin Gavin. What was it that made him so fucking possessive? It wasn't even that he was having a 'grr, my mate, no one else,' moment or anything, just… Gavin was _his._ Which was not right in the least because Gavin wasn't property. But still how he felt. Fuck. Just if there was someone else like him that he could talk to. Ray was close, but he didn't know everything.

Michael started back to the office, then stopped as he heard shouting. What was going on? Curiously, he made his way over to the kitchen, where the little redhead that had glared at him was arguing with her dark skinned friend. "And I'm saying there's no proof," she was saying, going quiet as she caught sight of Michael.

"What's going on?" he asked, hooking his thumbs into his belt loops.

"Someone's missing," the dark skinned woman told him, her voice surprisingly low. "And I've been saying the last place we saw her was in here."

Michael couldn't even blink as he felt frozen, the words breathing horror into him. Missing. In the kitchen. He looked over at the pantry, then back at them. It was happening again. People were going missing again.

The redhead shook her head. "There's no proof," she repeated. "She might have been somewhere else when she went missing."

Her friend stared at her for a moment, then rolled her eyes. And there was something about how her eyes caught the light that told him she might not be human. Well, that told him that hey, he could definitely tell who wasn't human. Which only answered one question and gave him a million more. "Fine. Michael. When did you last see Lydia? Short, white blonde hair?"

Oh. The one that had been too casual about ghosts. "About a week ago," he started, then broke off as a sudden heat wave hit them.

Either he had forgotten how hot it could get, or it was worse than before because it made him dizzy as hell. The two women stumbled a bit too, the redhead actually falling to one knee. Her friend helped her up, then tensed as something hit the door of the pantry. All of them stared at the pantry as the heatwave subsided, wondering what was about to come through. If something was going to come through.

Finally, the dark skinned one made her way over, grabbing the door handle. She had barely touched it when the door slid open, and a body was dumped at her feet. One that looked barely human anymore with how badly mangled it was. Both of the arms had been broken, and one leg absolutely shattered. Cuts and gashes were everywhere, staining the clothing deep red. The hair was so badly matted with blood that he couldn't tell what the original color was. Whatever happened to this person was horrible, brutal, and violent.

And then the woman screamed and fell to her knees, pulling the body into her lap. Which was when Michael saw the face. That girl - Lydia's - face.

Fuck that noise. People were going missing again, and now they were being spat back out mangled as shit. Enough was fucking enough. "Hey, you!" Michael came over to the pantry, slamming the door a few times. "Yeah, I'm talking to you, you fucking shithead! Didn't have enough with a fucking vampire coming to kill your ass? Now you have to come and do this shit to us? Yeah, we're not playing this shit!"

There was a crowd gathering around thanks to the screaming, but he didn't care. This fucking thing was killing people again. And now leaving their bodies like bread crumbs. The image of Gavin being spat out like that, his face frozen in a mask of terror while his body was broken, made him slam the door a few more times. "You listening to me, you fucking shit?" He was lisping, fangs pressing into his lips, and he didn't care. His hands were probably not human anymore either. "We're not going to play this fucking shit! You wanna go? You want to fucking go, fucking throw down with us? We're here! We're ready to kick your ass anytime! Hell, I'll kick your ass anytime!"

It was getting hot again. Good. The fucking thing was listening to him. Michael started to bang the door a few more times, then swayed a little. It was really getting hot. And dizzy. And… he wasn't feeling good. He felt his grip slip from the door handle as he stumbled, falling into the door.

And never hitting it, falling forever into a void as his eyes closed.


	7. Chapter 7

It stank.

Michael woke suddenly, pushing himself up at the smell invading his nose. Something like that meant something went wrong, and he needed to be awake to know what it was. Blearily, he looked around, trying to get his bearings because no, this was not his apartment. And it wasn't the Achievement Hunter office. Or anywhere in the Rooster Teeth office either.

Light cast off of the stone walls, a warm amber glow that illuminated the room. Except, he noted, in a few places. The walls were scorched there, black, emitting no light. Slowly, Michael got up, going over to one patch and reaching out to it. Just as his fingers hovered over the mark, he yanked them back. It was _fucking hot._ So either the walls themselves were hot as hell, or this happened recently. When he passed his hand near a non-scorched part, it didn't radiate any heat at all. So, recently. Great. He didn't want to know what the hell made that mark. Natural, man-made, inhuman, magical, whatever, he did not want to know what it was and just wanted to get the fuck out of here.

He turned around, absently licking his lips and being careful of his fangs. Wherever 'here' was, he didn't recognize it. He had been transported somewhere by a fucking pantry door. Somewhere probably not on Earth, if those glowing walls were any indication. Michael started walking across the room, noticing the scorch marks getting more frequent. So whatever had happened started over here. He continued on, then stopped as his foot stepped into something that made a disgusting squelching noise. Michael made a face and pulled his foot back, looking down to see what it was he had stepped in.

Blood. No, he had stepped on the big pile of flesh floating in the blood. Michael felt himself start to retch as he stumble back, just now making himself aware of the floor.

At first, his mind didn't want to put any of it together. The scurrying didn't match with the mounds of flesh, the twisted face lapping up the blood before turning to him didn't register. But then another creature made its way out behind another flesh pile, claws clicking before it stopped, hissing at him. Then another, and before long it was a whole army of _fucking rat-shaped demonic fuckers_ hissing at him. And this was the first time he had actually seen it full on, not while it was possessing someone in his world, not out of the corner of his eye… and fuck, there were so many of them and he had _cut his claws_ and they still weren't back to their length…

One leapt at him, and Michael managed to dodge the one. That was all it took for the rest to swarm him, claws and teeth at the ready. He kicked a few away, grabbing a few more that latched onto him and tossing them aside, but they were easily overpowering him. There were just so many. He growled, making the few that hadn't grabbed him shrink away, but it didn't stop the swarm from clawing and biting him. New blood splashed on the floor as they opened wounds on his arms. Michael felt his breath coming faster and faster as he realized that no, there was nothing he could do. He could try, but there were just too many-!

Then a yowling roar filled the air and they all scattered. Michael looked around for the source, then up. It was a lot bigger than he realized, the ceiling stretching much higher with outposts scattered throughout. But he still couldn't see what made that roar. His eyes lowered, and stopped at the bodies. At the half-eaten body of the intern that had gone missing when Gavin had gotten eaten. Her terrified expression stared back at him, only breaking as he looked around, seeing more half-eaten bodies. And then-

Then-

Something he didn't recognize. It wasn't… human. It had slumped over, blood running out of its mouth. The thing… looked fucking demonic. Black plate skin, black eyes, no hair… what was it? Was he actually staring at a dead demon? Fuck… was he in that dimension where demons were a thing? Quickly, he kneeled and tapped its shoulder, relieved that it didn't do anything when he did so and disturbed at how the skin moved under his fingers. Okay, so, dead demon.

Michael suddenly looked over at the intern that had gone missing before Gavin had gotten himself munched on, then back at the demon. _Dead demon._ And it didn't look blasted to shit. Was this what had been munching on all the interns back in the day? The thing that tried to eat Gavin and died trying? Michael grinned, giving it a shove. "Not so big now, are ya?" he asked it, standing back up.

Problem was, that didn't explain what had killed that new intern - Lydia. If this was the thing that had been eating people at Rooster Teeth, then what happened with Lydia? What was eating people now?

… what had made that yowling roar?

Michael looked back up, trying to find it. Something had made a noise that made those rat things, those… fuck, they were probably demons too. Those demon rat fuckers that could _possess people_ had been afraid of whatever had roared. And he couldn't see what it was.

At first, nothing. Suddenly, something dropped down in front of him, growling. It lifted its head, glaring at him with glowing slit yellow eyes.

And Michael's breath stopped.

The open burn on its face was the obvious thing, yes. But the glowing yellow eyes caught his attention next. Followed by the fangs, much too large and sharp for its mouth. Fur, covering everything as limbs parodied human limbs, stretching and moving in ways humans shouldn't. The twisted mangle of a hand ended in claws, length that his should be before he cut them. It looked demonic. It looked angry.

It looked like what Michael would look like if he didn't have human blood.

It was a fucking _cat demon._

Just as the thought occurred to him, the thing hissed and jumped at him, claws out. Michael tried to back away, and tripped. The cat demon rode him to the ground, sinking claws into his shoulders. Michael screamed, managing to throw the demon off and scramble to his feet. Oh God. He had to get away. He couldn't fucking fight a demon. Not one that was basically him but with full nonhuman blood.

Where the fuck would he go, though? He was fucking trapped. Michael made his way away from the piles of bodies, then turned just as the demon leapt at him again. This time, Michael twisted his body into a punch, stunning it for a moment. He could stand here and duke it out with the damned thing, but he'd lose. He knew that. He needed to get away, to live.

Except he wasn't going to be able to do that.

Fuck. His anger had finally gotten him into trouble he couldn't get away from. When he turned back to the demon, it swiped at him, opening up deep wound in his arm. Michael hissed, the opposite hand coming up to cover the blood pouring out over his skin. He was going to fucking die here. And his body was going to be spat out as a warning as well.

A growl built in Michael's throat. He had just wanted to save what was his. For a moment, he released his arm to punch the demon again, making it back away from him. He had just wanted to keep this thing from hurting Gavin. From hurting what was his. And now this was going to happen. He growled at the demon, getting one back in response. Good, it knew he was angry. Michael punched it again, only this time-

This time, his arm was caught in a clawed grasp and he went flying across the room. Michael landed in a heap and slid for a few feet before he started to struggle to his feet. Holy shit. Michael had barely gotten to a standing position when the demon landed on him, raking its claws across his face as they went down.

Fear filled Michael. He was going to die. He was…

Going…

To…

No.

Michael threw the demon off of him. Slowly, he rolled to all fours, and hissed. He wasn't going to die.

The demon was going to die.

He sprang at the demon, claws first. His clipped claws raked across its surprised face, making it stumble back. Michael pressed forward, snapping at it. He wanted to taste its blood. He wanted to _kill_ it.

The demon hissed back at him, grabbing his neck as he lunged. A choked noise escaped Michael's throat as he clawed at its arm, legs kicking at him, his feet trying to claw at him too. It growled, and tossed him hard. Michael's shoulder hit a wall-

Then-

Passed right through it as the demon faded from sight and he fell for what felt like forever.


	8. Chapter 8

His eyes opened when his back hit something. Groggily, his fingers scraped at what he had landed against, claws digging into wood. He felt along it, finding a seam and pushing on it. The seam widened into a crack, letting in light, but didn't open further. When he pulled his hands back, the wood fell back into place. Curious, he pushed on it again until it met resistance. Something was blocking it from going any further. He pushed again, hearing the sound of it rattle against the thing blocking it. He snarled, slamming his shoulder against it. Open!

There was noise on the other side. Someone talking. Then the thing blocking his path was pulled away suddenly and he fell forward to the ground into the light. A yelp, and he looked up to see what was going on.

"Michael!" He hissed and swatted at the hands touching him, smelling dying embers as he backed away from the woman with fire hair. That hurt. She was hurting him, and he had to get away. She held her hands up, long scratches bleeding red lining her palms. "Whoa. Everything's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. It's okay. You're back home."

He stared up at her, breathing heavily. She was kind. So very kind, and helpful. And he could tell she was scared. But when she reached out again, he growled. She had _hurt_ him by touching him. She didn't need to touch him. He backed away from her, slowly, keeping his eyes on her. Then, another sound caught his attention, causing his head to snap up.

A man stood there, looking at him, nostrils flaring. He was smelling something, looking around. Then his eyes caught on his, and he stumbled a bit. "Oh my God, Michael," he breathed. "You're back. You're… you're _alive._ Lindsay, he's hurt. Get something for that, something to wipe it up or…" He stopped, licking his lips a bit as his nose flared again, inhaling deeply.

"If you're thinking about eating him, Gavin," the woman ('Lindsay,' the name caught his attention, woke a part of him) warned him before there was growl aimed her. No, he knew who this man was. Gavin wouldn't hurt him. No matter what.

Gavin took a step towards him, and bent down. "Michael," he said gently, looking at him. "Don't growl at Lindsay. She's trying to help you. It's okay, my little Michael." A funny curve reached his lips as he looked at him, letting him uncurl a bit and look around.

He knew this place, somewhere inside of him. It was familiar, somewhere he had been often. He knew who these people were. Lindsay was nice, good. Gavin… he looked up at Gavin, narrowing his eyes. Gavin was his. No, he knew where he was.

Then the sound of others. People clamoring as they came closer. He started growling again, moving closer to Gavin. He needed to protect what was his. It had gotten hurt before, nearly killed. What was his was _his_ and needed to be loved, protected by him and he would do just that! He hissed as soon as the others arrived, moving in front of Gavin.

"Whoa, boi! It's okay. It's just Geoff and Jack." Gavin sounded alarmed as the other two stopped, looking at them in confusion. "Michael. It's okay." He paused, then there was the feeling of a hand between his shoulders. "What happened to you…?"

"Gavin, get away from him." Oh, he knew what that was. He hissed at that, disagreeing. "He's gone full animal. Jack, get Ray. We're going to need another shapeshifter here."

Ray. That was another name he knew. He paced in front of Gavin, trying to work out why. A part of him was waking up, responding to each call of 'Michael,' to Gavin's 'boi.' But there were still things trying to hurt him. It didn't need to be awake right now. Things trying to hurt him, trying to take away what was his. Whatever this 'Ray' was… he shook his head, watching the crowd grow and hissing if they came too close. They were going to try to hurt him and his. No.

The click of claws made his hackle raise as the crowd parted. A wolf made its way down, black and… oh. He knew that wolf. He had always known that wolf, and always know him. The wolf came closer, trying not to look threatening. He didn't need to do that. He knew this wolf, and what he felt. A rough tongue carefully lapped against his arm, making him hunker down and growl a little at the pain. It hurt, but he knew what he was trying to do. But he wanted to smack the wolf across the snout so hard for doing that. He looked up at the crowd, hissing at them. Go away. He wanted them to go away, leave them alone. They were his, his people, and he needed time alone with them.

Something nudged his shoulder, a burst of pain making him turn and smack the wolf that was trying to break his hissing right in the face with his claws. "Michael!" Gavin finally said, and there were two strong hands grabbing his wrists. "Stop this. What happened to you, my boi?"

No. He didn't… he didn't need to be _caught._ He struggled in the grasp hissing and spitting at Gavin as he did so. No, let go… Finally, he managed to pull one hand free, and tried to claw for freedom. When he managed to pull both hands free, something rammed into him from the side, pinning him down. The wolf. He growled, then sank fangs into his shoulder. No, he didn't need this. Get off!

Something hauled him up, pinning him against the wall. He growled as he kicked, looking up into blue eyes. "Stop this," the man growled back at him. "Gavin and Ray are trying to help you. Stop acting like this."

"Ryan…"

He growled at Ryan, only for him to grab his chin. "I know you respond to us," he told him in a low voice. "I know there's a human part of you that responds to us. Stop acting like a goddamn shapeshifter and act like that human. The majority of your blood is human, not shapeshifter." He clawed at the hand grabbing his chin, feeling the flesh part under him. "Stop that."

"Ryan, get away from him. He's gone feral." He knew that voice. That was the wolf… the human form of the wolf. "We can't do anything."

Ryan shook his head. "You're not feral," he growled at him. "There's a part of you that is _mine._ And I can call it back."

And with those words, Ryan's lips met his. He could feel something happening at the touch, something leaving, but it just… felt good. He opened his mouth slightly, feeling his fangs slide against Ryan's skin and tasting the blood that came after. His hands fell away from Ryan's wrists, relaxing as their lips shaped the touch into a kiss. Yes, that was a kiss. His eyes closed as he kissed Ryan, the part of him that responded to Gavin, to the wolf, to 'Michael,' to 'boi' coming to the fore.

Michael whimpered a little as Ryan pulled back, grabbing his shoulders. No, he wanted this. This was something of his, something-

Ryan grabbed his wrists, pinning him to the wall as he stared down at him. "Stop that," he breathed. "Or I won't."

The words didn't make sense to him. He wanted this. It was a part that called to him, called to 'Michael.' It was a part of him that remembered a night, of pleasure as he thrust deep inside of him. So Michael leaned forward as much as he could, trying to say it. He wanted this. He wanted this, with more… with all of what was _his_ …

And Ryan kissed him again amid a shout of surprise. He cupped Michael's face, body coming closer to pin him down. One hand reached under his shirt, fingers running across his ribs. Hips pressed against him, the hard feeling of an erect dick digging into him. His own cock jumped at the feeling, arousal burning through him as he gripped the wrist of the hand still cupping his face. The hand under his shirt brushed down, and cupped his cock gently.

"Ryan, that's _quite_ enough."

No. It wasn't. He wanted more. Michael started to growl, then let a breath out as Ryan's hand worked his jeans open and dove in, under the band of his underwear and grasping his cock.

"Ryan! Let him think and stop this incubus nonsense!"

"Don't." The word scraped out of Michael's mouth, needy. It wasn't fucking incubus nonsense. This was with permission. He wanted this. Ryan started to pull his hand out of his pants, making Michael whine. No. No, he wanted this. He grabbed Ryan's hand, keeping it there. More, more, more!

Instead of leaving, Ryan's hand moved against him again, making in groan. He wanted this. He wanted so much more than this, the feeling of others against him. More than just this. More than just Ryan's hand stroking him, making him gasp. It felt so good, so perfect, and he wanted more. He wanted Ryan to rip his pants off, to throw him up onto the table and fuck him right there. Sink his cock into him while he turned his head, while he opened his mouth to another's, hand grasping a third. He wanted-

Michael's thoughts cut off as he started to orgasm, gripping onto Ryan's shoulders so tightly his claws dug into him. It crashed over him, making his vision darken as his legs weakened. Slowly, Ryan helped him to the floor, the hand not covered in spunk stroking his curls. "Michael?" he asked quietly, looking him in the eyes.

"Mm… this was a bad idea, wasn't it…" Michael muttered.

Ryan laughed, still stroking his hair back. "You're thinking human again," he pointed out. "So it was a bad idea with a purpose."

Someone said something, but he didn't pay attention. Just to how Ray came closer, frowning as he grabbed Ryan's shoulder. "Hey man," Michael heard as he started to fall asleep. "We need to talk."


	9. Chapter 9

Everything _felt_ so much. Michael had forgotten about that.

The sudden snap to awareness made him start slightly. It wasn't that he had been dreaming - quite the opposite - but the shift from not conscious to awake startled him. Which proved immediately to be a mistake, as the feeling of his clothes running across his skin set every nerve aflame. Michael gasped, writhing as he tried to twist his body away from touching anything. But his clothing continued to drape over him, each fiber and thread running across his skin in such detail it was almost agony. It was worse than before, worse than when he had healed Ryan. Instead of something being draped over him, it surrounded him and he couldn't get away from it at all.

"Michael!" Hands came down to grasp at him and Michael screamed. Fuck, that felt even worse! He could feel the heat, the pressure, what felt like every line and crack in the skin as the hands gripped his arm. "Fucking Hell, Ryan, what did you do?"

Who cares what Ryan did? Michael tried to squirm away from the touch, letting out a sobbing breath as his clothes slid along his skin. It was just all too much. They needed to let go-!

The hands were ripped away, and there was a sound of someone hitting a wall. "Let him deal with this," came a softly growled answer. "It'll be okay."

"He looks like he's in pain, Ryan! You're telling me that's 'okay'?!"

Michael tried very hard not to move as there was a sigh. "This isn't the first time I've had sex with him," came a quiet admission. "He's done exactly this before. It's not normal, but I've never had sex with someone with shapeshifter blood before. Only humans. So the fact he wakes up sooner than everyone else, when he's still oversensitive is only normal for him."

Slowly, Michael opened his eyes to see Geoff backing down from Ryan. "Wish you had told me that before," he muttered. "Not the fucking - I knew that already. But this- hey, Michael." He ducked around Ryan, kneeling next to Michael, not yet touching him. "Hey there. You doing okay?"

He licked his lips, and winced at the feeling of his tongue running across his skin. Fuck, even _that._ "Yeah," he breathed, moving as little as possible. "Yeah." Geoff reached out, and Michael grunted, making him stop. "Don't."

"How long does this usually last?" he asked instead, looking at Michael. Ignoring the incubus behind him.

"Not much longer." Michael started to sit up, wincing. Okay, so that was mostly pain now. From his bandaged arm… Oh. That would explain a lot. And it wasn't as if he had forgotten the demon slicing his arm open. Thankfully someone had taken care of it while he was asleep. Gently, he felt his face, mindful of his claws and felt the butterfly bandages across the wounds. "Thanks."

"Thank Lindsay. She patched you up while you slept." Geoff stared at him for a moment, his fingers drumming on his knee with nervous energy. "So can I hug the shit out of you yet for being alive or would that be too soon?"

Michael looked over at him, cocking an eyebrow. "I know I did a stupid thing," he started when Geoff laughed suddenly.

"Stupid? Fuck, man. When you disappeared, we were certain you got eaten. You've been gone three days."

Three days. Michael took a deep breath, closing his eyes. "Did you tell the community I'm dead?" he finally asked, his voice faint.

"No. We… we haven't been able to make that video yet. Every time we try, it was like when we had to make the video about Gavin." And that had been a hard one to make. It had taken them nearly a week to finally find the words, to say Gavin Free was dead. And even then, they had barely been able to say the words. "So you're pretty lucky in that regard."

Lucky. He was lucky. Michael opened his eyes, turning to look at Geoff. He was so _haggard._ The weight of sleepless nights lay in his eyes, and relief made them shine. Slowly, he looked around. "Where's Gavin?"

"He…" Geoff sounded tired. "He didn't want to stick around after that little show. And I don't blame him. I have no idea what just happened between you and Ryan but getting a fucking handjob by someone else in front of your boyfriend is not the best thing to do. Just sayin'."

Michael's eyes turned over to Ryan, who was pretending he wasn't hearing the conversation. He had known, somehow, that what he would do would bring Michael back to human thought. Somehow, he had known something was happening and how to force it to happen. And something within Michael had responded to it, a part of him had responded to Ryan saying 'mine' as much as Gavin's heartfelt 'Michael' and 'boi.' He took a deep breath, licking a fang. "Shit," he spat out, remembering. "Ray."

"He's fine. He's a werewolf. Damn kid was starting to heal as soon as we started to check him out."

A breath tumbled out of Michael's lips. Good. He's was okay.

Geoff leaned forward, carefully pulling Michael into a hug, giving him enough time to pull out if it felt too much. "You fucking nonhumans need to stop pulling this shit," he mumbled, holding Michael close. "Especially you, Mr. I'm Going To Get Angry, Get Taken Away, And Come Back Torn To Hell And Back."

"'Michael' is shorter," he told Geoff, which made him chuckle.

"Smartass."

Michael smiled, resting his head on Geoff's shoulder. It felt good. But…

Fuck. He pulled away as he remembered what did this to him. What it looked like. "You should probably get out," he told him quietly.

"What? Why?!"

"I'm going to…" 'Shift' didn't sound like the right word anymore. He wasn't a fucking shapeshifter. He didn't have two forms he could go between. "Go back to being human. It hurts. And sounds nasty. Figure I'd save you from hearing that."

Ryan's hand came down on Geoff's shoulder as he opened his mouth to protest. "He's right," Ryan told him. "If you hear it, you'll want to put a stop to it."

Geoff looked between the two of them, and his face darkened a bit. "If this is to make the two of you be alone together," he started before Michael shook his head.

"Everyone. Out."

Geoff took one last long look at him before standing back up. "You better still be here when we get back."

That made Michael smile a bit as he waved his hand. Once everyone was gone, he sighed, laying back down. It would be a lot easier with Ray around, but… He closed his eyes.

He wasn't a shapeshifter. If that thing he had seen was really a demon, it looked just like what he should without all the human blood. It looked like something he'd be related to. Fuck… it looked like he was fucking _part demon._

And that explained it. That explained why it was so hard to change back to human. It wasn't shapeshifting. He had triggered his demon blood, and everything was trying to tell him _that_ was what he was supposed to look like. That was always what he was supposed to look like. The fact he could turn back to human was only because he had so much human blood in him. Michael opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling.

He should embrace it. Stay demonic. Tell everyone hey, you don't have two shapeshifters on staff, you actually have a shapeshiver and a demon. But… Michael looked at his hands, noting the clipped claws. How would everyone react if they knew? They already saw him as a 'feral shapeshifter.' How would they react if instead it was 'demon'? And it wasn't as if human was completely off the table. He was mostly human. Or at least human enough that it fooled Burnie.

Fuck, no wonder Burnie didn't know what he was. He hadn't ever seen anything like that on this side of creation before. Of course Burnie wouldn't know what a demon actually looked like because Michael was probably the first he'd ever seen at all.

Michael sighed, then took a deep breath. The expected sickening crack laced with a scream filled the air as his hands went back to being human shaped. He laid on the floor, taking trembling breaths as he ran his tongue over human teeth. Eyes were probably the only thing still proclaiming his demon heritage right now. The only thing he couldn't change back.

Someone walked into the room, and stopped next to him. "Are you okay, my boi?"

Gavin. Michael stood up slowly. "Yeah," he told him. "All better now."

Shoving his hands in his pockets, Gavin shrugged. "I just. Wanted to make sure you're fine."

God. Michael's fingers picked at one of his own beltloops. "I'm going to be fine. Just pretty scratched up. Are you okay, Gav?"

"Yeah. Just… A bit awkward with what Ryan did to bring you back, yeah?" Gavin tried to smile at him, the curve of lips falling flat. "I guess… that complicates thing a bit."

"Just a bit," Michael muttered. "No, I… It's just something Ryan did, okay? It-"

"Called you back from being feral. As much as my words or Ray's touch did."

"I wasn't exactly feral." Should he? Fuck… Gavin deserved to know. "I… was demonic."

"Michael?"

"I'm not a shapeshifter," Michael ground out, looking away. "I found something there that looked like me without human blood. It's a demon. I'm part demon, Gavin."

For a moment, no one said anything. And then, finally, Gavin let out a long breath. "Oh Michael."

Michael grit his teeth, not looking at Gavin yet. "So yeah," he told him. "That's what's going on. I wasn't a feral cat shifter. I was being full demon."

"… and Ryan can bring you back?"

He nodded, still not looking at Gavin.

"Oh." Gavin's voice was so… small.

Fuck. Michael didn't want to deal with this on top of everything else. Not this whole relationship shit on top of being thrown into a demon dimension, finding out he's part demon, getting cut up, and having that shit happen with Ryan. "I'm going home," he told him. "I'm hurt and I'm tired."

"Do you need Geoff to give you a ride or-?"

"I'll be fine." Michael waved him off as he started to leave. Yeah, he'd have to repeat this to Geoff when he told him, but…

Fuck. He was just so tired.

Demon.

Great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, now we know what Michael is! And that is the end of Fall to Live Again. Thank you all so much for being awesome. Everyone is one thousand points of love and awesome apiece. I love you all for everything you do. Thank you, everyone.


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